Preventing Weeds in Your Garden

I've spent every spare minute the past few years weeding the damn garden.  About 3 years ago, I got the brilliant idea of spreading straw down to prevent weed growth.  Well, little Miss Dumbass here had no idea you were supposed to get "special" straw that had been treated or something.  Therefore, I had a beautiful garden full of grasses growing and strangling my veggies.  And I've been battling it since.

With help from my husband, I planted my gorgeous tomato plants (31 in all), sweet peppers (12), and hot peppers (6).  Normally, I get overly ambitious and creative, which was really fun when I actually had time to devote to it.  Now that free time is something I feel I'm much lacking, I took a deep breath and resolved to be simple.  In the past, I've grown everything - radishes, cucumbers, cantaloupes, watermelon, pumpkins, zucchini, peppers, onions, garlic, and tomatoes.  This year I went basic with just tomatoes and peppers.

Tomato plant

Hot pepper plants

After planting, lay newspaper down everywhere.  Make sure to have the hose on and ready nearby to spray the papers as you lay them down.  If not, you'll be cursing loudly enough to disturb the neighbor's dogs as you chase the damn sports section all over the yard, trying not to trip on the rails of the garden or trample plants.  Trust me, I know.

Use the regular printed papers, not the glossy ones.  Newspapers are now printed with vegetable-based ink so you won't be contaminating your pure soil with lead ink or anything.

Wet the newspapers as you lay them

I bought some organic wood mulch at Lowe's.  Lucky for me, it's the cheap shit mulch (less than $3 a bag), I guess because it breaks down so quickly and isn't treated with dyes or preservatives.  It's literally just shredded Cyprus.  I spread it to about a 1-2" thick layer.

Mulch laying in process

Mulched beds done

Mulch covering

Summary:

• Till the garden, pulling any weeds
• Plant your lovely fruit and veggies
• Lay newspaper down everywhere, wetting as you go
• Cover in mulch - 1-2" layer
• Cross your fingers this freakin' works

I seriously need this to work.  I imagine just pulling a few random weeds here and there, perhaps between the pavers or along the outside where the newspaper couldn't reach all the way.  In my fantasy, this garden looks exactly the same as it does in these photos, except with big bountiful, gorgeous plants, bursting with fruits and vegetables.  And I laugh in the face of weeds seeking to choke my lovely plants.  Muah-ah-ah!!

Apple Spice Hand Pies with Cinnamon Cream

Why are little girls so mean to each other?  My 8-year old daughter and I were on a field trip with school together and were having a great time.  At the end of the day, we were to all meet in a central location.  My daughter sat on a brick half-wall next to a girl in her class and Girl Scout troop.  They were chatting and having fun.  Along comes (well, hobbles, as she has a broken ankle) another girl in their class, who is also in their Girl Scout troop.  My daughter's friend asked her if she could sign her leg cast, and she said yes and handed her a Sharpie.  Then my daughter asked her if she could sign her cast.  The girl looked her square in the eyes, cocked her head, hand on her hip, and said, "Um, no."

My daughter hung her head for a second, shrugged her shoulders, and then started doing some clapping rhyme thing with another kid.

So what did I do as mama bear observing this?  I took this snotty princess of a little shit and knocked her off her crutches and instigated a roar of laughter from all the other third graders.

Not really.  I actually bent down and whispered in her ear, "If you ever shun my daughter again, I'll come into your house in the middle of the night and hit your mom in the face with box of Fruit Loops while she is sleeping."

Would I do that?  Nah.  Although I wanted to.  Badly.

But what I wanted to do more was have a little chat with her mom, who is equally as much of a diva, and explain to her that she's doing her little girl a disservice of leading by example.  I can speak from experience because she doesn't talk to me much less look at me at any Girl Scouting event.  You can just tell she was the oh-my-god-whatever cheerleader chick in high school who had way more friends than I did but none of them were actually real.

So my poor, sweet, loving daughter and I came home and made some Apple Spice Hand Pies.  And ate several of them each.

The best part?  The cinnamon cream sort of melts and gets all creamy and gooey.  Like a cherry cheese danish with apples in a hand pie form.  Unreal.

Apple Spice Hand Pies with Cinnamon Cream
Makes 16

4 Granny Smith apples
2 T. butter
1 t. cinnamon
1/2 t. nutmeg
1/8 t. cloves
1 c. brown sugar
1 T. cornstarch
1 T. vanilla extract
pinch salt
8 oz. cream cheese, room temp
1/2 c. powdered sugar
1/2 t. cinnamon
4 pie crusts, uncooked
1 egg
3 T. sugar
1/2 t. cinnamon

Pre-heat oven to 425*.  Line two sheet pans with parchment paper.

Peel and chop apples.  In a large skillet, melt butter over med-high heat.  Saute apples for 5-10 minutes or until beginning to soften.  Add cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves and saute 1 minute to bloom the spices.   Add brown sugar and saute 3-5 minutes or until syrupy.  Make a slurry with the cornstarch and 1 tablespoon water.  Add to apples and cook 1 minute, or until thickened.  Remove from heat and stir in vanilla extract.

While the apples are cooling, whip (by hand or with a mixer) the cream cheese with the powdered sugar and cinnamon until light and fluffy.  Set aside.

Using a 5" biscuit cutter or similar (I use a funnel), cut rounds of the pie dough, rolling scraps as necessary to make 16 rounds.  Fill rounds on one side with 1-2 tablespoons of apples, leaving a 1/4"-1/2" edge.  Dollop 1 teaspoon or so of the cream cheese mixture on top of the apples.  Dip your finger in water, run along edge, and fold over pie dough to seal.  Crimp with a fork by rolling the fork so the twines push down on the border.

Beat egg with 1 tablespoon water.  Mix sugar and cinnamon in separate bowl.  Brush tops of hand pies with egg wash.  Sprinkle with cinnamon-sugar.

Bake for 15-20 minutes, rotating and switching pans halfway thru.

Homemade Vanilla Extract

I go thru a lot of vanilla extract in this house.  I always double (or triple, or quadruple...) any amount called for in a recipe.  And I only use pure vanilla extract because the imitation shit is flavored from wood by-products and chemicals.  Heinous!  Pure vanilla extract will last forever and it only has two ingredients.

Real vanilla extract can be hella expensive though.  I've seen it go for as much as $20 for 8 ounces.  Instead of becoming a slave to the makers of rich, pure vanilla extract who charge the price of a small car for this liquid gold, I make my own.  It's easier than you think, as long as you have enough patience to wait.  Like 2 months.

I bought a half-pound of extraction grade vanilla beans online at Amadeus Vanilla Beans.  Let me tell you, half a pound of vanilla beans is like a small football sized amount.  Some people say the beans must be soft and fresh but I prefer the drier ones.  They are not pretty, and they are a bit hard, but once they are in the liqueur of your choice, they soften up.  Plus, with a lower moisture content, you get more beans in your half-pound than the same weight of pretty, plump ones.

So what booze to use?  I started with vodka, which is the traditional extract liquid.  It's flavorless so all you taste is the rich vanilla.  I also pulled out the bottle of bourbon we always have in the front of the liqueur cabinet (I mean, it was 10 am - I was parched).  And behind those bottles was a bottle of rum left over from Thanksgiving cocktails.

Why some people use shit liqueur to make extract, I have no idea.  I find the foul, harsh, gasoline flavor in such shit liqueur doesn't go away simply by adding vanilla beans.  That would be like putting whipped cream and a cherry on a steaming pile of puke.  I used Tito's vodka, Maker's Mark bourbon, and Cruzan aged rum.

This photo is vodka extract after 3-1/2 weeks.  I bought this bottle for less than $3 at Walmart (holy schnikes, I hate that store).  It took the two small (pint) jars to fill it.

You'll need glass jars of some sort to store your extract in.  I used several sizes of empty mason jars.

This shows what the jars look like only moments after filling.  The small pint jar in the front has the rum, which is a barely different color than the vodka.  The bourbon one is obvious. After only a day or two you'll start to see the color change.

The large jar and two of the smaller ones have vodka.  Here's a closer look.

 

Homemade Vanilla Extract

8 oz. liqueur (vodka, rum, bourbon, or brandy; at least 35% by volume)

5 or more vanilla beans (I use a lot, but you'll need at least 5)

glass jars with lids

Take each vanilla bean and with a sharp knife, cut down the bean lengthwise to open and expose the tiny vanilla bean seeds.  Place beans in glass jars and add alcohol.  Put the lids on.  Store in a cool, dark place for 2 months to extract, shaking daily for a week, then whenever you think about it after that.  

As you use your extract, the vanilla beans may become exposed.  Now you have two choices.  You can either top off with more booze, or yank out the beans and stuff them in a jar of sugar to make yummy vanilla sugar.  If you leave them exposed (as I did once) they'll get slimy and funky and ruin your extract.

Tabouleh

Also known as Tabbouleh and Tabouli, this is a super-refreshing Arab dish.  It's typically eaten as part of a mezze, which is sort of like a tapas thing served in a spread of several small dishes.  But, as usual in these glorious United State of America, we whore it out.

Now, this "whoring it out" could be looked at as either amazingly awesome or incredibly blasphemous.  On one hand, we are not limited by conventional "must do it like this" ways and are free to tweak and twist ingredients and foods to fit our own likes and dislikes.  However, there is definitely something to be said for preserving the history of hundreds of years of culinary tradition.

Either way, Tabouleh is a helluva yummy salad or side or main dish.  It's especially good in the summertime when the tomatoes and cucumbers and parsley are so good it makes me want to slap my Granny.  (I don't really want to slap my Grandma.  For those of you who have not heard that expression, it's a southern thing).

Here's the thing - you can change so many of these ingredients to suit your own palette, it can only be delicious to you.  Some people use green onions instead of red.  You can also leave the mint out if that's too strange to you.  There are recipes that have more of a parsley base and the grain is the addition, but I prefer the grain as the base.  If you don't like Quinoa, you can use the traditional bulgar, or even couscous.

For this batch, I found I was nearly out of Quinoa so I supplemented with some whole-grain couscous.  Play around and let me know what you like the best!


Tabouleh

1 c. quinoa
2 c. water
3/4 c. small diced red onion, or about 1/2 a medium onion
1/4 c. lemon juice, or juice from 1 lemon
1 cucumber, peeled and small diced
4 roma tomatoes, seeded and small diced
3/4 c. fresh minced parsley
1/4 c. fresh minced mint leaves
4 T. olive oil
salt & pepper to taste

In a large bowl, mix the red onion and lemon juice.  Allow to sit (the lemon juice helps to cut the sting of the onion) while you prepare the rest.

Bring quinoa and water to a boil.  Turn down heat and simmer on low, covered, for 15 minutes.  Stir and re-cover, and set aside off heat for 5 minutes.  Bring to room temperature and fluff with a fork.

Mix all ingredients, including the onion/lemon juice mixture and cooled quinoa.  Serve as a side dish, or with pita bread, or in a toasted pita half.

Lentils with Carrots & Onions

I'm sort of obsessed with Pinterest.  I realize I am not alone in this either.  There are a million zillion people on it, pinning all sorts of things such as crafts, home decor, and of course food.  And now I have a to-do list about 7 miles long, complete with projects and ideas I found on Pinterest.

Apparently there is a "male" version of Pinterest (not that guys aren't on Pinterest - pretty sexist if you ask me) called Manteresting.  You don't pin, you nail (I mean, really.  Let's be honest. Men love to nail things, right??).  And these guys nail stuff like sports cars and beer and Jon Stewart and hot women in daisy dukes.  Or hot women in daisy dukes washing sports cars and drinking beer while Jon Stewart tells jokes.

Looking at so many fixer-upper pins on Pinterest, I could get really excited about reupholstering a chair that someone found in a dumpster.  However, I have never dumpster dived, and (fingers crossed) will never do so.  Thus, all my fun little projects have little hope of ever actually getting done.  And I run the risk of becoming a hoarder like the ones on the shows where they seem to always have a lot of cats and a Big Mouth Billy Bass among the piles of shitty flannels and 14-year old issues of Women's Day.

Per usual, this has nothing to do with the recipe below.  Just typing as I think.

Back to the food (who gives a shit about my thoughts on Pinterest?)...

This meal is a warm, stick-to-your-ribs kinda food. It has a slight Indian feel to it, but you can always leave out the Garam Masala if you want.  By the way, Garam Masala is available at the supermarket in the spice section - McCormick's makes a good one.  I like a lot of vinegar at the end to add a tartness.  Serve with crusty bread or naan.

Lentils with Carrots & Onions
Serves 6 for a meal

2 large yellow onions, chopped
4 large carrots, chopped
6 cloves garlic, minced
1 - 28 oz. can whole plum tomatoes
1 cup red lentils
3 teaspoons Garam Masala
2 teaspoons cumin
2 teaspoons dried thyme leaves
2 cups vegetable broth
1/4 cup chopped cilantro
red wine vinegar, for garnish

Heat a bit of olive oil in a dutch oven over medium-high heat until shimmering.  Add carrots and saute for 2 minutes.  Add onions and saute.  Cover pot and cook until the onions are slightly browned, stirring every once in a while.  Add the garlic and cook another minute.

Meanwhile, pour the tomatoes and juice into a bowl.  Using your hands, carefully squeeze the tomatoes, breaking them up into bite-sized pieces.  Pick over the lentils for any rocks or ugly ones.  Rinse.

Now add the garam masala, cumin, and thyme to the onion mixture.  Season to taste.  Allow to cook for a minute.  Add the tomatoes and juice, lentils, and broth.  Bring to a boil, then lower the heat and simmer, covered, for about 40-50 minutes or until lentils are tender.  Check it occasionally to make sure the liquid hasn't evaporated.

Once cooked, stir in the cilantro.  Serve with red wine vinegar at the table.  I like a pretty big splash in mine, to cut the sweetness of the onions and carrots.

Serve with naan or crusty bread.

Garlic and Oil Spaghetti with Parmesan

461...  461 Ocean Boulevard is the address of one of Eric Clapton's recording studios.  NASA announced the discovery of 461 new planet candidates a few days ago.  461 BC is known as the Year of the Consulship of Gallus and Cornutus.  It's also the number of days since my last post.

So much has happened in the last year and 3 months.  I'm still working, which is 99% of the reason I haven't posted in so long.  If you read any of my last few posts, you'll remember how I questioned how the hell any of you fellow bloggers do it while working outside the home.  Luckily, I've found (mostly) a balance with working, kids, husband, and home.  It's only taken this idiot 1-1/2 years to do so...  Thus, at the encouragement of my husband and a few friends, I'm going to give FKS another go.  No promises on how often I'll get to partake, but I hope to continue as much as possible nonetheless.

Enough of that.

You may remember our Basset Hound, Sobe.  Unfortunately, he was very sick and died just a few short weeks after my last post in November 2011.  We grieved, and still do, missing him every day.  However, we got a puppy (Jesus, what were we thinking!?!?) just a few days after Christmas.  Her name is Vera Ellen, after Vera Ellen, from our favorite holiday movie, White Christmas.  Hopefully the dog will not turn out to be anorexic like the human Vera Ellen.

Vera is 14 weeks old and full of energy.  We were used to a dumb, lazy dog (sorry, Sobe, but it's true). So a highly intelligent, energetic, bouncy little pup is a bit of an adjustment. And lately she's taken to humping my daughter's legs.  Perfect.



My husband and I also decided to go totally vegetarian.  I have never really liked the taste of meat much, so I decided to see if I could go full on vege.  Turns out, it's pretty much the easiest change I've made.  Ever.  Plus I feel good that none of my food ever felt pain.

How about that pasta, you ask?  It's delicious.  It's easy.  You probably have all these ingredients on hand, except maybe fresh parsley.

Don't be alarmed by the shit-ton of garlic in this recipe.  You're making Garlic and Oil Spaghetti, after all.  It's garlicky but in the sweet, subtle yet pungent way garlic can do when it's behaving.  It is probably a bit spicy for those with a delicate palate, so feel free to cut back on the red pepper flakes.  The lemon and parsley add a brightness to the full garlic flavor.  The buttery breadcrumbs provide a crunch that pairs nicely with the salty Parm.

Garlic and Oil Spaghetti with Parmesan

1-1/2 T. butter
1/2 c. Panko breadcrumbs
1 lb. spaghetti
6 T. olive oil
1/4 c. minced garlic (1-2 heads)
3/4 t. red pepper flakes
3 T. chopped fresh parsley
1 t. lemon zest
2 t. lemon juice
1/2 c. grated Parmesan
Kosher salt

Heat butter in a large non-stick skillet over med-high heat.  Add Panko and salt, stirring until golden and toasted.  Set aside.  Wipe out skillet.

Heat a large pot of water until boiling.  Add 1 t. Kosher salt.  Cook pasta according to directions. Scoop out about a cup of pasta water and set aside.

Meanwhile, in the same skillet used for the breadcrumbs, heat 3 tablespoons oil, 3 tablespoons garlic, and 1 teaspoon Kosher salt over med-low heat.  The garlic will foam and become light-golden brown after 10 minutes or so.  Be sure to stir very frequently or it'll burn and become bitter.

Pull skillet off heat and add remaining 1 tablespoon garlic, red pepper flakes, parsley, lemon juice, and 2 tablespoons pasta water.  Stir to combine.

Put cooked pasta back into the hot pot.  Add remaining 3 tablespoons oil, lemon zest, and about 1/3 cup pasta water and toss well.  Add garlic mixture and season to taste.  Add more pasta water if necessary to make it moister.

Place pasta in serving bowls and top with breadcrumbs and Parm.

Sort of based on recipe by Cook's Illustrated March 2001.

Stuffed Peppers

I'm sorry.  I apologize for this super-long hiatus in posting.  Life has been, shall we say, really effing crazy lately.  I've barely had time to piss, let alone cook, photograph, and blog about some amazing foods.  I feel bad about the time that has passed since our last encounter.  It's way too long in my book, really.  Oh, FKS blog, how I've missed you.

As some of you know, I've started working again.  This was totally unplanned and quite the surprise.  I really love my job but working coupled with three kids, soccer practice and games, homecoming dances, band rehearsal and gigs, HOA duties, and just basically having a life is a difficult balance for me.  I don't know how you people do it.  I know there are bloggers out there who work full time, have 7 kids, a spouse, and a house full of animals and still manage to post 5 days a week.  Good luck to them and their blood pressure.

So here we are with a fantastic recipe for stuffed peppers.  I actually had never eaten them until I made this recipe.  Therefore, I don't have a great control for what they're supposed to taste like.  All I know is that these are damn good.

The peppers are creamy and silky.  The stuffing is hearty and flavorful.  The sauce tastes like it's been simmering on Grandma's stove for 15 hours.  The best part is they cook in the slow-cooker for hours until perfection.  Really delicious on a chilly autumn evening.  It appears I've really been missing out all these years.

Stuffed Peppers
Serves 4

4 bell peppers - red, orange, and/or yellow
1-1/2 c. low-sodium chicken broth
3/4 c. arborio rice
8 oz. hot Italian sausage, casings removed
2 onions, chopped fine
6 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 t. dried oregano
1/8 t. crushed red pepper flakes
1 (28 oz) can crushed tomatoes
2-1/2 oz. grated Parmesan cheese (1-1/4 c.)
2 T. chopped fresh basil

Slice off the top half-inch of the peppers.  Seed the inside of the pepper cups.  Chop the pepper tops, excluding the stem.  In a large microwavable bowl, microwave the broth and rice for 13-15 minutes, until tender.

Meanwhile, cook the sausage in a large non-stick skillet until browned.  Drain, reserving fat in skillet.  Put sausage in the large bowl with the cooked rice.

Add onion and chopped pepper to skillet and cook until browned, 8-10 minutes.  Add garlic, oregano, pepper flakes, and season with salt and pepper.  Cook 30 seconds.  Add tomatoes, bring to a boil, and remove from heat.

Mix 1 cup of sauce and 1 cup cheese with the rice and sausage.  Pour the rest of the sauce into the slow-cooker.  Using a skewer, poke 4 holes in the bottom of each pepper cup.  Fill each one with the sausage mixture.  Place in slow-cooker.  Top each pepper with the remaining cheese.  Cover and cook on low for  4 to 4-1/2 hours until peppers are tender.

Once done, remove peppers to a plate.  Stir in the fresh basil to the sauce in the slow-cooker and serve with peppers.

Recipe from Cook's Country August/September '11